By Nic MacBean

Stolen from www.abc.net.au/news/justin    

Doubts have been raised over the reliability of genetic testing. (ABC News: file photo) 

Australian insurance provider NIB plans to write to 5,000 of its customers offering half-price genetic testing. The company says the service will help people manage their health, but concerns have been raised about how the information can be used to discriminate against people. 

 Of particular concern are the ramifications for people applying for life insurance, which NIB also sells. The letter said customers did not have to give the results of genetic testing to NIB, but the fine print said they may have to give the information to life insurance or superannuation providers.

In Australia a person applying for life insurance who has had a genetic test can be forced to give the results to the insurance company, including how likely they are to contract various genetic diseases.   The Investment and Financial Services Association’s (IFSA) guidelines on genetic testing say the results might lead to higher premiums, shorter periods of cover, the exclusion of some medical conditions or a refusal of cover. Associate Professor Christine Barlow-Stewart from the New South Wales Centre for Genetic Education says she is worried about the accuracy of genetic tests. 
 ”We’re not sure, even as experts, of the reliability of the interpretation of the data that comes out,” she said.    “The risks that are given to you, there are still some questions as to whether we can really understand what that means. I think it is far too early for these tests to be given in such a way.”   No local testing :NIB has offered its customers testing through an American company called Navigenics. The service will cost $US499 ($530) instead of the usual $US999. Professor Barlow-Stewart says it is important for people to realise that the technology is at such an early stage that overseas companies have to be used instead of local testing. The chief executive of NIB, Mark Fitzgibbon, said in the letter to customers that he had used genetic testing himself as a way of preparing for possible health problems in the future. He says while life insurance premiums might go up for some people, other people might enjoy lower premiums if they discover they are at a low risk.”All this is doing is giving them [life insurance companies] better information about the health profile of people,” Mr Fitzgibbon said. For everyone who might have to pay more because of their genetic predisposition there wilbe people who will have to pay less.  Both Mr Fitzgibbon and Professor Barlow-Stewart agree that genetic testing, if reliable, can help people plan for their future. ”This genetic testing service can help you determine your risk of developing preventable illnesses such as diabetes, obesity, heart attack and certain cancers,” Mr Fitzgibbon wrote. “Importantly, this knowledge can help you better prevent the possible onset of such illnesses.”

No, No No – you’re not having my DNA without my express approval, not some vague waiver about surgery and intensive care afterward. I only share my DNA with my 2 girls, Grand-daughter and my wife.

I get free  health care and they want to gamble – I gamble. Let’s keep the odds a secret. But I won’t voluntarily submit to DNA testing if I’ve done no crime.

I’ve already agreed to be a total organ donor, take what you want after my death, it’s on my driver’s licence.

That’s  my will.

I had a nightmare that I was in China.

I woke up and abruptly discovered that that Jamieson was actually in China.

In China.

Time goes slowly here. Jamieson happened by the local French mega mart, wearing plastic gloves with his checkout items. Steak, vegetables (for the evening stew), MP3 player, study heating device.

It’s my turn. Girlie says “wait a moment” empties the cash register into a bag and refills it with change. Oh, that’s 6 minutes.

Jamieson is normally a patient man, nudging 50, and is reasonable. He waits, he waits, he is patient.

Oh, there’s a problem with the bar code on the tissues. Jamieson waits, patiently. Minutes pass by. Problem solved.

If Jamieson was 25 years younger, there’d be a hissy fit in Chinese and a walk out, leaving all items. Nice to be senior-  a little more patient.

Oh, Chinese New Year tonight ? Huge fireworks display tonight and it’ll last until dawn. That’s why Jamieson is smart and has earplugs in the bedside drawer. He also plays very loud western music in the study.

I’m disgusted at the waste of millions of Suzhou Government  public funds on frivolous fireworks when I get approached by a scrawny 5 year old girl begging from me whilst waiting at a red light on my e-bike.

Signing off now, Jamieson.

No Joke.

Had 2 pints of Guinness with a valued staff member, English Dave and then off to home on my birthday.

To an empty apartment.

My home that I had to check for thieves before I was comfortable.

Lovely card, but Happy Fucking Birthday Laowai, Foreigner.

Reality of China. I’ve become very soft here.

Don’t become soft in China.

China will eat you like a prawn if you’re not careful.

I should harden the fuck up.

Be careful in China.

J.

So what, your wife has chosen to her duty to the village and you chose to stay here, doing squat , writing little computer programs in Suzhou.  And crying –  Fuckwit. Idiot. 

Oh, that’s just great. a crying foreigner, just what we need, another useless Laowai.

Sorry dear reader ; I noticed a Chinese lady co-worker crying into her arm on Friday 5 Feb, comforted by other staff.

Refused to get involved, it’s not my problem- I’m becoming disturbingly Chinese, I don’t want that. 

I REALLY dont want to become a creature in China with no feelings.

She was crying in the office, next to me and I did nothing.

Anyway, back to work. Crystal V needs love.

You’ll see Jamieson waving some code around. Nah, that’s the non-real stuff, mere leakage from Jamison’s skull in China.

The good stuff is locked in.

If laserCitadentalreceive1 is false then gosub alertPrimary else gosub maintain

alertPrimary :
gosub Alertprimary
End

sub  Alertprimary
Open Ch1, port 9 Transmit, baud =9600, 8,1,1

‘ rem  Crystal V China 3 Client SMS message Main break

ATDT 9600,8,1,1, 13771989234
6 Feb 2010 18:34:38
Crystal 5 激光系统警报
Crystal 5 Main Laser Beam Break Alert

Close Ch1
Close port 9

End sub

******************
Stop Crying, Jamieson, for God’s sake : you are becoming annoying, stop being so fucking clever and get back to work.

You are becoming pathetic.

You thought I was stupid.

Sorry.

Jamieson has mysterious skills.

Chinese Lasers….My way.

7 years in China  and doing it my it MY way.

I’ll hug the Chinese lady crying in the Office.

It’s not appropriate, but I like her, and a furry Laowai hugging her might cheer her up.

Doesn’t matter, I’ll quit soon.

Who’s crying next ?

Jamieson

I want to lash out, but lash out at what ? Chinese supression and childish firewalling of the Internet ? Students that mumble ” I ah, I ah, I ah….

This is no place for a real Research and Design Engineer.

At least J. provides coin back home for 2nd daughters’ orthodontic work, thousands – trust me.

Jamieson has a huge emotional investment in Crystal V, creative juices, Aussie know-how and can-do, coupled with Finnish expertise for advice and recommendations.

In future, I needn’t worry about my children financially. They’ll get incremental tri-yearly upgrades.

When Madinah reaches 21, she’ll hopefully have a lot of money but with my discretion. I don’t want her to be a spoiled girl/brat. I may even insert codicils in my will.

Damn. I was hoping to keep my device secure, now the something associate is talking about Chinese and US patents for protection.

Actually the device is the scariest, least penetrable security system, something about nasty lasers, radio based, scary, encrypted randomised  handshaking  (Our Secret).  And that is  just the start. We seem to deal with secrets.

What radio? What frequency ? I love it as a design engineer.  I Choose the protocols and that’s it. No further info.

Do you handle multi-layer encryption ? We do. How’s about 7 layers ? Want to take the Pepsi Challenge ?

You’d be surprised what happens in the skull of Jamieson.

Are you a dab-hand at random laser modulated decrypting and matching  for a re-print? I didn’t think so. Didn’t tell you about the extra 5 levels did I ?

Laser , ”Our Encryption changes from random moment to random moment. No more easy stuff.  No user guides.”

Just Jamieson’s programming, then it gets really hard to compromise. Really, really fucking hard to uravel. As I said before “You don’t know Jamieson”.

I might add some microsecond  Infa-Red laser bursts to send some handhaking. Just for fun.

Then there’s the 4 extra layers.

Jamieson, hard at work. Immediate SMS from a vault.

We agreed at the start to never compromise our clients, that’s our starting creed and our belief statement.

To instance this, Jamieson received EO Edmund Optics China catalogue today 28 Jan 10: www.edmundoptics.cn for review.

It’s not a gradual process, lava like. We provide immediate world class solutions, most contemporary answers on the spot.

Whew. I like Lasers, they never lie when I control them.

I told you again and again – you have no idea of the actual Jamieson or what it has done, or can do. 

Jamieson is the passer-by in the street, the guy fixing sewerage problems on a farm in West Australia with gloves on, alternatively the argumentative chap in the boardroom wearing a suit, successfully resolving proposal disputes.

Jamieson is perhaps the mad scientist, with bizarre ideas that become real.

Jamieson might stand next to you, buying a newspaper and scratch lotto tickets on a Thursday.

He might be waiting for a Taxi in China, competing with you.

Or you might be sharing bait whilst fishing on a dangerous rocks with huge waves in Western Australia. And surviving a huge washover.

He’s so lucky. Read this, and you’ll get some of Jamieson’s Luck. You’ll get some of the Luck on this – in fact I’ll share a small part of my luck with you, give it to you – free of charge.

In fact one of my dear Associates got a gig at ‘Laris’ (AKA 3 on the Bund), one of the top 5 restaurants in Shanghai, and will start (Guaranteed) later at a different restaurant after getting a rave review of his flair in the kitchen as a Head Chef  <revised>, after 4 years without an apron.(as appopriate)

He got infected by the Luck. I smile as I share the luck. The Luck keeps showering on me, not a golden shower… just too much for me.Now, the  Chinese Luck will follow him wherever he goes. Sort of like the Midas Touch, but not so metallic.

Another story – but this young man is headlong to Michelin Star level.

Wait for the next episode. An imagined cure for AIDS, Hepatitis C, colds. I have to say imagined because it’s illegal to state that the device “cures” anything, but results…..

I’ll write later, imagined. Wait for the luck. You have no idea.

I select the persona: “the argumentative chap in the boardroom”.

Actually today, Jamiesons wears jeans and long johns, a turtle-neck shirt, a turtle-neck sweater, a grubby zip-up top and a scarf from the wife. It’s 2 degrees outside and 12 in the study with a heater.

You Say.

<Jamieson suddenly realised that he is become the mad scientist. deliberate.

Part of his surname…. Mad….Meh. How can you turn light into money ? Lasers, my boy, lasers.>

Dad, what’s a laser?

Cruising down a local boulevarde in Suzhou in the Bike lane, gets a red light.

No problem, brakes the electric bike and assumes a stopped position with both feet on the road – the nearby sign ticks down, 43, 42, 41 seconds until J. is safe to proceed with caution.

Chinese Girlie on an e-bike ignores the red light, whizzes past Big. J. and smack. Huge Suzhou-Singapore International School (30 metres long) bus is turning right on a green, and she rams it at speed on the side.

Of course girlie is off the bike, she’s on the road, bike’s also laying quietly next to her. Driver and Children Supervisor are off the bus and help her up.

Driver starts a tirade, gesticulating.  Jamieson watches with mirth, skips 5 light changes to watch this stupid girly tearfully bleating about compensation (in Chinese). Fuck off !

In China, the first thing is call 110 (Police) in a traffic accident, and they’ll turn up quick smart. If the Driver and Children Supervisor had approached Jamieson as an eye-witness to the incident, I’d gladly recount the event to the Cops. Step by step.

That’s why I waited, arms folded – and watched.

Perversely – I’d wished, hungered, longingly wished  for years in China to be a witness to arrogance and stupidity by a bike rider ignoring a red light and getting whacked. 

Spatial awareness honey – and simple rules…..You are NOT the only person in the world.

Wishes come true sometimes ! Mine finally came true. She wasn’t hurt.

That’s why there are red lights and the reason that Jamieson wears a funny bike helmet over his beanie when riding the electric bike in winter.

…and obeys the traffic lights. You know, kind of stopping at a red, just for fun.

*************************

Whaling : Southern Ocean‏

From:	jamieson  <fake> @hotmail.com)
Sent:	Wednesday, 6 January 2010 7:36:23 PM
To:	consular@japan.org.au

******************************
Copyright owns to :
http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2010/01/06/2786875.htm?section=justin

I really, really don’t want you to provoke Jamiesons’ anger over this. You might get badly hurt, quickly by a very quiet and sensitive man. You’ve been warned.

I have a grandchild and I’ll volunteer as a radio op on the ship – and I live in China. I’ll pay. Grit your teeth and discover Jamieson.

You can be Jamieson.

…..and you say.

Cut in half.    Think about that. Then think about the whales. The crew. The cold sea. Sinking and the Mayday.

Story about how a Granny had folded up 10,000 RMB (about 2cm thick), wrapped it in newspaper and somehow misplaced it on a public bus. Some other passenger discovered it, called the Cops and gave it to the driver to deliver it to her Supervisor when she had finished her route and was due for a break.

And called the local TV.

Because it was called in, it was incident on file (these things can easily be deleted in China) and there was a media follow-up, so Granny Wang was later ferried to the Cop shop by 5-0.

GW arthritically, slowly unfolded the newspaper and there was the wad in toto. Smile for the camera ! Don’t look at the camera.

10 Grand is a huge amount for GW. 2 years tuition for the grandkid. A years’  food for her and hers + gifts.

Reminds Jamieson of his incredible, yet ongoing Luck.

Or : <I rely on the Kindness of Strangers>

Did a bus trip in 1986 with the <then> Mrs J. + nipper on a night trip from Kuala Trengganu to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. Nipper cried most of the way until she finally fell asleep at the teat, to the delight of the adjacent passengers.

J had already hissed at them politely in Malay several times “We’ve tried everything we can…”

Dawn.

We hop off, grab the suitcases, 6 week old baby and … Your handbag ?

Oh, just fucking great. Great. Lucky that J. has 1,200 or so Ringgit in his wallet in the rear left pocket. Just in case.

“If I forgot to tell you, our 3 passports, ATM cards, travellers cheques (AUD$12,000), Hotel vouchers, a swag of cash AUD $3,000 + 2,000 Ringgit and Qantas airplane tickets back to Australia are in that bag – on the fucking bus.”

Vroom.

Lucky we’re in KL. A called friend comes by to pick the <then> Mrs J. and nipper for safekeeping.

I’m in a petrol station at 5.30 am with a sign holding “Penang?” –  Because the Cops don’t think this is an emergency and not worth a Highway Patrol pull-over. 

(Jamieson believes this is actually an emergency).

“What ?”

Anyway, this Chinese Malaysian guy pulls in for a fill up, sees the sign and motions me to get in.

He’s delivering new cars to Penang  from KL for customers who want green instead of white.

Off we go, chasing the bus. I’m nearly spearthroated by a load of steel pipes lingering over the bonnet as we overtake a lorry. Nice. 140 km/hr and it’s not even “run in” ?

He enjoys the novelty of the chase with a foreigner, obviously. Something from a movie perhaps ?

Finally sight the bus, parked at a roadside breakfast restaurant. We stop.

J. scampers in, sights the bag and slides it open, all in order. Syukur, AlHamduLilillah. Has a quick chat with the bus driver to explain things in Malay.

Offers the speeder a nice breakfast several times, offers to pay for the petrol -but is waved away.

J catches a southbound bus and is later told that her associate, a Police Superintendant recently posted to KL from Trengganu is at Headquarters, may have made things easier.    Sigh.

J & Co. leave Malaysia with ease. What?  You don’t speak Malay? Get a grip on Jamieson.

That’s Jamieson’s Luck. Shanghai/SuzhouThere’s more enduring stories of Jamiesons Luck in the very near future, so stay tuned.

A very English affair, by invitation only. It was fairly proper, stiff upper lip lads (actually, no – I teased the kids running to and fro - stood up, then yelled to the guests :

“Ladies and Gentlemen, stand – please… A Toast <pause> To the Christmas spirit, Merry Christmas ! All rise and toast”.)

So, Jamieson finishes and dons coat & backpack then struts out to the street
to hail a taxi. Nope. Nope. Full. Nope. Full. Near an hour, Fuck.

Big J. then strides kerbside with a partial Ned Kelly beard and strange gown, parting the crowd with appearance and scowl only.

Wait a further good 20 minutes for “Hello Mister” after the door slam.

“Nar Li ?”

I advise our chauffeur in flawless, polished Suzhou University Chinese (#64 in China I’ll have you know).

“Sir, if it meshes with your schedule and you are not too busy, could you please take me to ……….Guang Shan.

Jamieson doesn’t fancy joining the China traffic video game, so he closes his eyes and naps slightly in the back seat.

We’ve arrived. J opens his eyes, fumbles for the wallet, a modest $3 Australian dollars. Other expats swoop on the available returning cab. 

I get out and – suddenly I know that voice, that accent. It’s you ! Little Mat !

I remember you!

Last I heard you were about to be deported from China. 10 days notice to return to Katoomba, New South Wales (Australia).

We did an IELTS gig at Suzhou University together with the Finnish lady, remember that South African chap, Johan ? You’re in their brochure, so is she.

What are you doing here ? I give him my card.

It’s a big world, but also a small world. It is acutely small in Suzhou, same size as Sydney, 6 million.

Yet I suddenly meet an Aussie mate long forgotten, presumed expelled – in the twinkling of an eye.

That’s the Kingdom, and that’s :
Jamieson’s Luck.

The Luckiest Man in China.

Update : 27 Dec 09. It’s snowing in Suzhou and Jamieson has 1 more class time gig to augment the wallet. Bed and 2 quilts is the preferred option.